Born in the U.S.A. (But Mistaken for an Immigrant)

I have a colleague at work, Bridget. She's a nice woman, very Wisconsin, to use bad grammar.  Her screen saver is a picture of her on a snowmobile, she yells "Go Packers" at the end of her voicemail, and on a shelf behind her desk she placed a stuffed Bucky Badger doll wearing a cheesehead hat. Like I said, very Wisconsin.

But I'm not complaining.  I enjoy working with her though our paths don't cross every day.  Over the months, though, several of her mannerisms caught my attention, not in an overtly negative way but because they seemed mildly strange.  For example, when talking with me she spoke louder and slower than with other colleagues.  She was also prone to explaining basic things that every Wisconsinite should know, like how to grill brats.  And after using 'big' words she would occasionally turn to me to explain: "diligent, that means hardworking" she once said.  I chalked it all up to her wanting to seem smart, or, conversely, that she thought I was mildly impaired or had bad hearing.  I don't have a complex about my IQ, so didn't mind.

Then, last week she called me up with a request.  "Eli," she said, "My daughter is a freshman in college and has an assignment to interview a foreigner and then write a report.  You're the only foreigner I know.  Do you mind if she interviews you?"

My mouth dropped in surprise.  "Does living abroad for many years count?" I asked.  "I'm a red blooded American just like you, U.S. born and raised."

Bridget stuttered and stumbled, apologized and quickly hung up the phone.  It was an enlightening moment though because her past behavior suddenly became clear.  Now I understood why she spoke with me loud and slow, why she explained basic things, why she treated me as a mildly impaired nut case.

And it also made me think what it means to live as a foreigner in the U.S.  I had always thought that the issues that a foreigner must face are such things as overt discrimination, lack of understanding, miscommunication.  In other words, the big things.  I didn't think about all the small, subtle moments, things that are not overtly hostile but may possibly even be motivated out of good will: being treated as the 'other' or as someone with a mild impairment, explanations about basic things that the listener already knows.

For me, Bridget was an isolated case.  If everyone had treated me like she does than it would have been different, like living in some strange Twilight Zone world.  Maybe these are the kind of issues more commonly faced by foreigners in less immigrant-populated places away from the coasts.  I don't know. But at least now I knew that I hadn't been imagining Bridget's off-kilter relations with me.  And it made me curious whether subtle mistreatment (if that is the right word) is something that many foreign-born Americans must deal with.

As for me, I plan to ask Bridget at some point why she thought I was a foreigner - did she hear it from someone else or detect some mild accent from my years spent abroad?  But for now I'm content just to observe.  I'm curious if, now that she knows I was born in the U.S., she'll begin to treat me differently.